How to Talk to Your Tween About Social Media + Body Image

A gentle guide for parents navigating the tricky tween years, How to Talk to Your Tween About Social Media + Body Image

Today’s tweens are growing up in a world where social media, filters and “perfect” images are everywhere. Even kids who don’t have their own accounts still see content on friends’ phones, YouTube, or shared threads at school. And while social media can be fun, creative and social, it also introduces ideas around beauty, popularity and comparison long before kids are emotionally ready for them.

That’s where we, as parents, come in. After all, talking to tweens about social media and body image doesn’t have to feel overwhelming. Instead, it’s simply about giving them the tools, language and confidence to navigate what they see. So, here’s a gentle, realistic guide to help you open the conversation.

🌼 1. Start the Conversation Early, Before They Need It. Talk to Your Tween About Social Media + Body Image

Many parents wait until body image becomes an issue before stepping in. But the tween years (roughly 8–13) are the perfect moment to lay the groundwork.

Kids need to hear things before they start comparing themselves to others.

A simple chat like:
“There’s a lot online that looks perfect, but photos and videos can be edited or staged. Real life looks different.”

Small conversations now prevent big insecurities later.

🌸 2. Keep It Casual, Not Confrontational

Tweens respond best when it doesn’t feel like a lecture.
Try weaving chats into everyday moments:

• in the car
• after school
• while shopping
• at the beach or pool
• while choosing swimwear

This helps the topic feel normal, not awkward or embarrassing.

💬 3. Talk About What They’re Seeing, Not What They Should Look Like

Instead of focusing on their body, focus on the content they’re consuming.

Ask questions that encourage curiosity:

• “Do you think that photo is edited?”
• “How do you think she feels posting something like that?”
• “What do you think makes someone interesting besides looks?”
• “Does this make you feel good or pressured?”

This builds critical thinking, not self-criticism.

📱 4. Explain How Social Media Really Works, talk to Your Tween About Social Media.

Tweens are smart, they can understand the “behind the scenes.”

Teach them:

• Photos can be filtered, reshaped and staged
• Influencers earn money by looking a certain way
• People only post their best moments
• Algorithms push content that gets reactions, not content that reflects real life

Once they understand the mechanics, it loses its power.

💛 5. Help Them Notice How Things Make Them Feel

A powerful skill for tweens is recognising their own body and emotional signals. To help them start, you can say:

“If something online makes you feel unsure, uncomfortable or pressured to look a certain way, that’s a sign it’s not healthy content.”

From there, teach them to check in with themselves:

• Am I comparing myself?

• Am I feeling bad?

• Am I wishing I looked different?

And most importantly, remind them that it’s always okay to unfollow anyone who doesn’t make them feel good.

🌟 6. Model the Confidence You Want Them to Learn

Tweens watch everything, even the things we think they’re not noticing.

Try to avoid:

• making negative comments about your body
• obsessing about weight, diets, or “fixing” things
• complimenting others only on beauty

Instead, model what you want them to feel:

• “I love how strong my legs feel.”
• “My body helps me swim, run, hug and do so much.”
• “I feel good when I take care of myself.”

Confidence is caught, not taught.

👙 7. Choose Swimwear That Helps Them Feel Confident, Not Self-Conscious

The tween years come with developing bodies, new curves and lots of feelings. Because of this, swimwear can easily make or break a day at the pool,  which is why age-appropriate, supportive designs matter.

Look for pieces that offer:

• coverage without feeling childish
• secure straps
• double-layered fabric
• comfort for movement
• cuts that don’t reveal too much
• styles that feel modern but not grown-up

This is exactly why Fernleigh Avenue was created, swimwear tweens can feel confident and comfortable in.

When they’re not tugging, adjusting, or stressing about how they look, they enjoy summer so much more.

🤝 8. Keep the Conversation Open, Not One and Done

Body image isn’t a single chat.
Make it an open, ongoing conversation by checking in gently:

• “How are you feeling about things online lately?”
• “Anything making you feel weird or pressured?”
• “Anything you want to talk about?”

Let them know you’re a safe place to land, always.

💛 In Summary: How to Talk to Your Tween About Social Media + Body Image

Talking to your tween about social media and body image doesn’t have to be heavy. Instead, it’s simply about:

• normalising the conversation

• acknowledging what they’re seeing

• teaching them to question content

• modelling confidence

• giving them swimwear that supports comfort, movement and their growing bodies

With that in mind, open communication, gentle guidance and supportive environments help tweens move through these years feeling strong, confident and beautifully themselves.

And if you’d like to go deeper, check out our other blog and resources on building body confidence:

Helping Your Tween Build Body Confidence: A Parent’s Guide to Swimwear Tweens

Finding the Perfect Tween Bikini: Confidence, Comfort & Fun in the Sun